Having to do resume and send in application again is sucha chore...
It's been 6 whole months ever since I last wrote a resume and actually send to employers.
Quite at lost of what to do... x_x
Lee Hom's concert is coming up on 01 Nov... I think i'm gonna give it a miss this year again...
The past week is so happening.
Lots of unexpected stuffs happened to the people around me including myself.
I don't know what to say.
Hearing the stories of my fren's break up one follow by another, I really do feel sorry and sad for them.
Well... all I can say is, thing comes and go... You can't really do anything when a person's heart in not on urs anymore. Can't blame anyone and it's not ur own fault too. This is life.
I guess I'm not in a good position to judge others cuz I am in the situation too.
Break up and attached again. :)
I know what my frenz will said to me when they saw this post, TINA! WHY U ATTACH AGAIN SO SOON...
Fact is, I don't really know why I have the ability to do it but I just do.
This time I can't really choose who I wanna fall in love with cuz I just fall in love like that so naturally w/o much hesistation. And, how did it happen that cause me to become like that again, I don't know.
I think, all along I am searching for that someone.
It sounds so silly, I am silly I think.
I am a person with bad record.
It's like my result. All bad, bad, bad and suddenly one distinction out of nowhere poped out.
After that distinction, bad, bad, bad again.
I hope this time is a distinction, or maybe something better than a distinction...
Well, at least I don't need to think about relocating to oversea anymore.
I believe in him, believe that he is someone who can show me a whole new meaning of what life is about.
I hope we're moving together on the same pace and looking at the same direction in life.
:)
下午4:27
sometimes i just wonder...
what is life trying to do with me? making me running in a circle times and times again. until i'm exhausted and losing hope in life.
I've learnt to be cautious towards each new relationship with the special someone.
However, I keep finding myself, placing that someone high above than my other priorities in life.
In the end, make a fool out of myself.
Mistakes, same old mistakes.
However, ever since i know mr.lao ah pek, I'm sort of become happy and positive. Izzit because I have him to talk and he will listen to me? So, I'm not so lonely anymore?
I'm glad that I know him. He helps me a lot when I'm really lost and down.
Cheers me up in his mashimaro face. :D Push away all his cute gals' date to accompany me.
Most importantly, he's there when I need him.
I don't know whether it is because when I need someone, he is just there at the right moment.
All I know is, he is someone rare to come by.
His past doesn't matter to me, what matter most is the present n future him.
I like who he is, the 'he' that I am seeing now.
The type of feeling is true and vivid.
I'm not saying we are together or other thing... It's just that, I like him.
Simple enough, I like someone now.
Like my previous post, I know my bad points and I'm learning to change them.
I don't know this time round whether mr.lao ah pek is the destined one or not.
I'm scare to know too..
But feeling this type of thing, so difficult to control n explained.
It's like, I'm looking at his face and wondering, how did we end up having feelings for each other?
Just unexplainable...
Wat to do? Life is still so full of mysteries even though I have gone through quite a fair share or it.
晚上11:58
I have two very big bad points.
Stubborn and Impulsive.
And one more is Blindness.
Because I am Stubborn, I don't take my friends' advices when they are the one who can see the whole situation very clearly.
Because I am Impulsive, I tend to do things that will make me regret and feel very stupid after I did it.
Because I am Blind, blind in my heart, I can't judge something very well and end up doing things that will hurt me and others very badly.
If I never start the whole relationship, We wouldn't end up this way.
If I never promise anything, He would not be so hurt.
If only the If can be redo again.
I will try to change my bad points. Cuz these will led to making situation getting out of hand and my life getting out of control.
I'm a grown up, I shouldn't be so silly and dreamy.
上午9:44
Single? In a relationship? Married? Divoced?
I know things are different from the past in the modern 21st century nowadays. But, does it implies that even human relationship too? Especially the status of the unusual relationship between a man n a woman.
I just don't understand.
I used to have an ex-boyfriend who loves to play friendster. He told me he loved me and his heart belongs to me only. However, when I browsed his profile in friendster, the status is 'Single'.
Some men always said, "I'm too lazy to change, you know, you're the most important person in my heart is enough." or " why? don't you trust me? c'mon it's just friendster. nth else, you don't have confident in me or you?"
The problem is, we, women are easily insecure animals. If you really love us, why can't you, men, changed the status to 'in a relationship' or 'attached' in those friendster or facebook profile?
Why do you want to claim that you are single when you are attached to someone who means a lot to you?
After all, some men never promised that they will married some women when in the relationship, how can some women trust wholeheartly to that some men?
It would be more worst in the man is married and claim ' Single' in the profile isn't it?
Certain things just need to make the stance clear to avoid unwanted quarrels and disagreement. If simple thing such as status in the virtual world is not clear enough, how can the whole relationship be maintain? And I think, some women did the same thing too, not only referring to men.
In my opinion, I just think this type of status reflects how important n serious u r towards the relationship that u have commit to that special one.
Just my 2cent worth thinking...
晚上8:51
I can't believe that I slept my whole sunday's morning and afternoon away~
Reached home around 4+am today after a night out to celebrate friend's 21st bday.
Oh well, guessed it should be the most expensive and sumptuous dinner that I ever have in a friend's gathering.
Dinned at the Jumbo restaurant.
Lobster salad; Each of us entittled a claypot of sharkfin soup; XO big prawns soup; Black Pepper Crab; Some fried noodles; Big, Fat White Scallops with Asparagus; Fried Dough Sticks with some fish meat inside and the dessert, HoneyDew Sago Ice. In between with Ice Wine which according to Mr. Niao Sheng Dan that it is an extremely expensive and seasonal wine. Which I think the taste is sweet and aromatic, suitable for us ladies to savour. :)
I hope they love the cake that I chose for the birthday boy~
Though there was some small incidents happened through out the night, we still enjoyed the gathering after all. And, did i mentioned that there was an firework going on while we were having our dinner? I ran out of the restaurant and starred blankly at the fireworks. Imagine, fireworks in Clark Quey, it was like oh so romantic~
Hit the karaoke bar after the dinner in Clark Quey, a bar called Whisky Bar.
Ladies and Gentlemen, an important annoucement is to be made. If you're not a regular customer in Whisky Bar, please do not ever, ever enter the bar. This is due to the overwhelming of regular customer crowd in the bar that decreases your chance of singing the song that you have requested. The dear lovely waitress will just skipped your request and fulfil it with their favourite regular customer's request. So all the night, you will just keep hearing the same group of people singing their songs over and over again.
Thank you for the attention.
Next time, I will be reminded by myself that, if I ever want to sing songs, go to the karaoke box like KBOX, Party World or etc. Worst come to worst, never step in Whisky Bar located at Boat Quey. However, the friends get to do more talking and photo taking and drinking.
Pics will be update later.
Bunny, are you so busy? will you please please pleaseeeeee.... date me out in the coming week?
晚上9:09
my day starts to get better during the evening time. cuz i told my boss about my failed exam n can't bring myself to tell her i wanna quit the job. she told me i could take off to study for my exam. so i am off from next monday onwards.
i hope this time eveything will be fine cuz.. i can't afford any changes in my plan anymore. it's making me mentally tired and lose confidence in whatever things i'm going to do in future.
yonatan is as lovely as usual, making an effort to send me msg while he's oversea. but will he still be able to do this and our heart will be able to stay as close still when he go back to his normal old life?
I doubt myself.
I doubt myself for believing he can do that.
For I no longer the old Tina who believes her love one easily like she used to.
It's just when you think you've found the love n destined one of your life and intended to spend your whole life with him, he suddenly turned his back to you and left you half-hanging alone.
I can never forget how hard and terrible it was for me to break up with such a man. A man who I wanted to marry so much. Till now, he is still the only guy who makes me feel that i want to marry to him.
rants~ i feel so fustrated right now.
why does some men have to make things so complicated? Do things to prove it when you said you love someone. N i mean significant and in a good way. Something like, you love someone then make a poetry or a song about that special one, do something you never done b4 for that someone to show how special she is to you. There must always be something you never done b4 to others and you can do to show how important and special she is to you.
starts from small thing like a hand-made card or buying flowers or others... no matter how bad your art n craft is, or how cheap n ugly the flower is, just do it cuz it might happen to cheer her day and you can always have room to improve.
Some men can't keep promises then don't make promises easily! We hate people who break their promises. Just tell us honestly with an apology, sorry i can't make any promise to you. That's it, n we will understand. In case we don't, too bad, you're not the one we looking for as a bgr candidate.
There's just so much things i can write down like mistakes made when you're in a relationship or dos n don'ts in a relationship or dating guide to dummy boys etc etc.
N if i were to do that, I think, it probably took me years to produce something like what i mentioned above.
I'm going to bed now. nitey nitex~
凌晨12:18
i'm feeling tired n weary...
life has to go on.
all the time, i though i got nothing to lose in this world ever since that matter.
which is why i'm not afraid of being out alone all the time.
until one day, he told me, "you've got me to lose".
i always told myself, take everything easy and even if one day he leaves u, at least u will not be as sad as last time.
his words woken my deepest, inner soul that i locked n buried it down straight to my heart core long time ago.
he's right, i've got him to lose now cuz he is important and means a lot to me.
though up till now, i kept on self-denying. i still can't lie to my heart that he've become someone important in my life that i'm afraid to lose more than anything.
all i want to do is to let us have some time together for the one last time.
the rest will be decided base on our destiny and i will have no regret for my entire life.
ever since i learned that i've failed the module again, i've become fearful this time.
totally, freaked out.
i don't want to end up spoiling our holidays.
It's enough, seeing someone you love being sad for some reason that you've caused.
Once, it's enough.
I'm going to try one last time.
throwing my fave.job away, w/o distraction for just one last time.
If at the end of the whole matter I still can't pass the module, I will accept whatever answer that fate have arranged for me.
i totally hate what a shit situation i'm being stuck in now.
晚上11:39
